Response to Anonymous

No, not that kind of anonymous. This post is here in order to respond to a comment left by an anonymous reader. While I'm on the topic: responding to comments is a difficult task for me so I've opened up a poll on the side. Please respond if you've the time. It would mean so much to me. [:

"Anonymous said...

I'm sorry this is really terrible-sounding and I don't want to come off as sounding though I will anyway...I mean, I love your blog-to bits-but I always thought you were a girl :(

Are you a boy?... and since you had a girlfriend then are you a gay transexual or just a very very effeminate boy?

Please I'm sorry I guess it doesn't matter if you never respond to something like this but I'd like to know and get the facts straight"

There's no need to apologize because you haven't done anything wrong. Never be afraid to ask questions. As they say: it's better to ask and feel silly for a few moments than to be quiet and be dumb forever. ("There's no such thing as stupid questions - just stupid people." Nonsense. Everything we know is learned so you have to figure it out at some point. Better to educate yourself when the opportunity rises than miss out.) Wow, that turned into a tangent...

Back on topic: you're not the first person to ask me this question. I run into it often. I addressed it briefly in one of my previous posts by saying...

"P.S. I'm a guy. I've sneakily avoided directly mentioning my gender on several sites, but I gave up and said it on one of my pages: 'My blog and MySpace can tell you more about me than this space can - but I'll tell you one secret that they don't know: I'm anatomically male. I don't like to use the word "transgendered" (or any variation thereof) because it makes me think of people like Isis from America's Next Top Model. I'm don't consider myself pretty in the feminine sense as they are. I don't wear dresses or a full face of makeup. I don't want to have a surgery to remove my boy parts, but I'm not going to stop taking my hormones and lose my girl ones either. I hope to be more open about my anatomy in the future but I'm not ready to reveal that much about myself on MySpace or via my blog yet. I guess you could say that I'm testing the waters here. I don't mind what people think of me (it won't make me change,) but I am very weary of making them uncomfortable."

To expand on what I mean by this as it applies to the eating disorder community: it's a known fact that statistically speaking most people who have anorexia or bulimia are young women. What I've gathered from my personal experiences tells me that most of these women are simply more comfortable interacting with another woman. Unfortunately most of them have had very negative experiences with men. Some of them feel that a boy cannot relate to their experience as well as another girl could. Surly I cannot discuss a period I've missed or how badly I want to fit into a prom dress. I don't know what it's like to genuinely worry about losing a bra cup size due to weight loss, nor can I explain how PMS works (or even relatively what it is.) :/

For this reason I have tried my very best to use genderless nouns and so on prior to this post. I would ignore any comments pertaining to my gender. I did not want to risk making anyone feel uncomfortable. Furthermore I have created friendships with more than one person who has something along the lines of "don't add me if you're a boy" on their MySpace. (They added me and started conversation. I simply reciprocated in my usual fashion.)

As for the "gay" question... it's really up to your own personal interpretation. I consider myself a man, I am anatomically male, and I thought of the relationship between my girlfriend to be heterosexual. Some people would mistake us for a lesbian couple. Some people would think we were a gay couple. Sometimes people thought I was the girl and she was the man. It didn't bother me.

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I don't mind the term effeminate being applied to me. It's okay if you consider me to be a trans-sexual or a transvestite. I've learned that people will inevitably stick whatever label they are comfortable with on me (and in all honestly I am most comfortable with that.) I'm not too easily offended. I'm amused by the creative terms people come up with.

I feel like I should throw in something about my intake for the day. All I had was an avocado and orange juice. It was a strange yet delicious combination. My recent sorrow makes me absent minded. Or have I always been, yet was less attentive?

If you have any more questions or comments I'll respond to them as best I can. Thank you for reading.